On a different and just as upsetting note...

OK.

I get it.

I won't buy lottery tickets this week.

Money down the toilet.

This is a bit of a complicated and odd story, but, it is what it is.

When I went to Wilderness EMT training back in October I met a really sweet kid, all of 19 years old from a small town in the North West US. There was something about this guy. It felt like he belonged with "us" as in my camp crew... It was a feeling I just could not shake. So I made some calls, called in a favor or two and offered him a position as my assistant this summer (for two or three weeks). I got his plane ticket covered, got him set up for salary (a good one for a first year at only three weeks I might add) and some other perks. It was a good thing.

I asked people to pray about it for me. There was just something about this situation, a feeling, an intuition... he belonged here for the summer. God had a plan and I was so excited to see what it was... It was a hope and excitement I held onto whenever things were tough in these pre-camp days.

We corresponded a bit, planning, setting up and he was pumped and seemed committed. I got the administration staff pumped... It was clicking.

Today he e-mailed that he is not coming.

In the grand scheme of things it is not the end of the world. I even have another assistant, great guy I've worked with before at camp, for the time when this new guy wasn't going to be there, and that's a good thing, but...

On top of everything else I feel a bit let down tonight. There is still this feeling in my heart that there was a purpose there, that it was something important. I've had that feeling before, and more often than not I was right.

Apparently this was less often than not...

I wish him the best of luck, and May God Bless Him, whatever God's plan is for him.