Closure... New Birth

Robin had a beautiful baby girl on Friday night. Nora Simone. What a blessing!

On Monday I went to the "Final" Director's meeting for camp. Final as in final one from this summer. In a couple months we start this whole circus over again getting ready for next summer. Anyway. The meeting.

Actually it was a dinner. The night before I had a really long talk with one of my best friends up at camp. It was a good talk. We had been through a lot this summer, especially the last few days and I was very worried that there might be damage, especially the unrepairable kind. Nope, he was just really busy. He even rode with me the next day to the meeting. It was over an hour either way. We had a lot of time to talk then too.

It is amazing to me what real friendship is. One of the things I find the most fascinating about people is our relationships, how we deal with each other. This was one of those moments. It was epiphanic too as I saw how much I mattered to others. That I matter at all, even.

Also, just to finally let go the horror that was the last Saturday night at camp and the hell that ensued. The mistakes, the panic, the doubt and the self loathing that comes from bad choices, bad luck and bad timing. (Makes it sound like I decided to tight-rope walk across an alligator infested swamp and took a few friends with me and then had to hall them all out of the swamp when the rope caught on fire... Doesn't it? It wasn't actually anything all that bad in the end, I just wish it had gone differently.) When he and I talked about everything and got it all out, I was able to let it all go. I could finally find the humor in the whole mess (and trust me there was a lot there too) and for me the moment I can find the humor, I can find the positive and the negative becomes of negligible effect on me for the most part. Also, getting it worked out on earth also helped me be able to really get it worked out with God and that's the best part.

This week I've started back with my trainer after my 11 week hiatus. The exercise machines are kicking my butt. Yet, I feel good. Monday night, last night and I imagine tonight are some of the best sleep I've had in months. My heart and soul feel lighter and maybe my body too?

Lastly, as a unrelated note, if you have ever read Harrison Bergeron by Kurt Vaughnagut. Robin's sub attempted to equate the story to the Taliban today in my first period. I think I need to find things for him to do as far away from my lessons as possible.